Sharing the joy of food, art, love, sex, commentary, gardening, crafts, Abba, alcoholic beverages and a genetic predisposition toward anxiety disorders....
Sometimes a picture says it best.
Amen, sister! I absolutely abhorr any kind of Christmas music. Sorry about the sentimental Precious Moments folks who squalor in it's insepid cacophony of bells and all things Mannheim.
Kristabel, I'm determined to have a merry Christmas just because Thanksgiving went so badly this year. I actually like Christmas music though, and Christmas movies and almost all the other aspects. The part that bothers me is Christmas cards: What do I write? Dear friends and family, we've had a terrible year. Happy Holidays. When things aren't going right, the holidays magnify the despair by about 100.Anyway, I have two words for you: Holiday Parties! I hope we're both invited to plenty.
So what will happen when I sing "Deck The Halls" to you as you are on the receiving end on the spanking bench?
Hi Dave! Just think of all the fun we're going to have when you visit Humboldt. Notice I said when.the sentimental Precious Moments folks who squalor in it's insepid cacophony of bells and all things Mannheim.That totally made me snort.
Sorry about Thanksgiving, Indie.As for Christmas cards, those long wordy newsletters where everyone's happy and pretty and perfect drive me nuts. I'd love to get one that says, "This year totally blew. It sucked ass, and we're glad it's over. Pass the tequila."In fact, I just might send that one myself.xo
So what will happen when I sing "Deck The Halls" to you as you are on the receiving end on the spanking bench?I'm hoping the sounds of big hands on ample flesh will be so loud that I won't be able to hear the singing.
I hate Christmas. Always have.On the bright side, finally something pleasant happening during this season:The Salvation Army bell ringer at Eureka's Henderson Center Rite- Aid disappeared. He actually showed up there the day after Thanksgiving, I believe. Nothing against the Salvation Army but I hate those bell ringers and was pissed to see them at Rite- Aid... again. Went back there a few days later and there was no bell ringer. Hasn't been one there since. I have no idea and keep forgetting to ask when I'm in the store. I have seen the same bell ringer guy doing his thing at a different store, though. Maybe they didn't have enough ringers to go around and moved him to a better spot?Regardless, this does make life a little more pleasant for me during this crappy part of the year.
Hey Holiday Season:Do you take it in the Ass?(bom bom bom bom)'cause your nauseating and perkybut unless you spank the turkeythere's no you and me are gonna lasthang in there chick!-boy
Hey friend,This year sucked ass and donkey boners, but just as we make the blood vow to never ever move again or any of our other 59 vows... I think to myself, damn I could use a slice of Mo Pie right about now.
Did someone say tequila?
Well, I see I'm in the minority. I love Christmas.It's a big production at our house.What IS it about Mannhein Steamroller!!! I HATE those guys. *shakes head* I still don't see why it's listed as "music". No accounting for taste.I LOVE that picture though. Hilarious.
Kristabel, can I quote you on that on my Christmas cards? That does pretty much sum it up. I hope your 2009 is better, dear.
My favorite version of Tequilla is performed by Pee Wee Herman.
KristabelSomething is wrong with my home computer and it won't let me comment on your blog. My feelings were hurt because I thought you had blocked me. Then I discovered that I couldn't comment on my own blog, and I felt better.Anyway, I have a friend that feels like you about Christmas. He had some business cards printed up that said: “Times are toughTime are hardHere’s your fucking Christmas card”He seemed to have a lot of fun passing them out, and everybody wanted one. He probably ended up having more fun with Christmas than most people do.
I hope yours is better as well, Indie.My dear sweet anonymous, I would never ever block you. You're one of my very favorites. Love the story about your friend. xo
unless you spank the turkeyHee hee hee heeeee. Snort.
Bee,what is a Mo Pie?Yes Kristabel my hot and warm hands will also aid in scorching that behind as well.
No kidding. All of this awful, cloying music must have driven Jesus nuts.Just imagine.
Hot and warm, mresquan? Hmmmmm.You still make me have to fan myself.xo
hot, warm, which one is it?
See, mresquan? It's not just me - even anonymous is curious about your hands.
You know, it would have been nice to add a few words at the bottom of the sign for the Spanking Bench Clinic.How are we to increase our congregation?(insert interjection here)!-boy
Left hand hot,right hand warm.
I'll take the left.
My glasses are steaming up!
Not to worry. He has cold feet.
Not to worry. He has cold feet.Sigh. Don't they all.
I don't want to name any names, but someone we all know and love bought 2...count them...2 Christmas CD's last year. And just the other night I heard Eko singing a certain song about some deer with Boogie boy.
And then, I strangled that MFin' deer with my bare hands...one hot...one warm.
mresquan, Mo Pie.... is just when ya crave something and you want mo' of it. it's also a tasty lil dish made by cute boys that need haircuts. It's parrot talk, friend speak....
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