This week we had the pleasure of following through on a court ordered mediation session.
Not the stuff that the Brady's would have had to deal with but our story just the same.
It seems to me now that during those great old episodes of The Brady Bunch, their blended family always worked out perfectly by the end of 30 minutes. Mr. and Mrs. Brady, always in the height of fashion, calmly and reasonably dealt out morsels of parental brilliance in a loving and thoughtful manner.
Of course, as a kid I thought, "How cool, I want more brothers and sisters." My normal, vanilla bland parents who were still married were definitely crimping my new found appreciation for the expanded version of family.
So this week, as I drove my 15 year old step daughter to the counselor, I hearkened back to what Mr. Brady might have said. "You know honey," I started, feeling pretty good about the term of endearment. "Your dad and I really want you to be able to talk to us about things that are bothering you." ..................Dead silence...................................Uh huh..........................................
OK, score one for the kid.
"Well, we just think that maybe you need someone to help you express yourself and figure out why you aren't turning in your homework and getting F's in school."...................Dead silence.................K.....................................................................................................................
At this point, as I try to now channel Mrs. Brady I can feel the irritation and frustration that my father (a Marine Corps Sgt.) must have felt when dealing with my brother and I.
This wasn't working out the way I had planned! Didn't these people know that we all come to realize that we love each other and that grades instantly turned to A's, children speak more than 1 syllable when spoken to, and that although Greg scratched the car or Tiger gets lost that we all laugh about it in the end when things go back to normal?
Even though I think I handled this situation with as much love and support as I could muster, I realized that Mr. Brady didn't have: a Bitch for an ex-wife, $650.00 garnished from his wages each month for child support and a $3500.00 attorney bill. I think the whole Brady clan would have been in counseling had they have to live through what we all have.
I have now changed my parenting style. My parents were right after all.
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11 comments:
Oh, honey....your stepdaughter is very lucky to have you. I'm sorry you're having a rough time.
Just remember...Greg was sleeping with Marsha AND Mrs. Brady while Marsha was snorting cocaine and starving herself. And you see what's happened to Peter...
It'll be okay. You've got my number if you want to chat. xoxox
But remember, if all works out well, Davey Jones will come and visit your step daughter.
Ker...what is this thing Ekovox has with Davey Jones?
Yes, as Dory from "Finding Nemo" says, Just Keep Swimming, swimming, swimming.
I'll eventually make it out the other side. At least I have a couselor and an attorney on retainer.
AND I will be sorely disappointed if Davey doesn't show up!
I don't know. Maybe he is secretly in love with him and writes about him nightly in his Hello Kitty diary with the lock and key.
How about it big E? Who is your dreamboat?
We posted at exactly the same time. Psychic cousin link.
Don't you remember the Brady Bunch episode when Davy Jones visited the family? Marsha or was it Jan, was the local Davy Jones fan club president.
Since your step daughter was making you feel less and less like Carol Brady, I was sure Davy Jones would make an appearance and everyone would swoon.
Hello Kitty? Are you crazy? My diary is the Partridge Family datebook. Sheesh.
In high school, my secret celeb hearthrob was Valerie Bertinelli. Damn you, Eddie Van Halen! And Kristy McNichol wasn't far behind.
Sorry, no Farrah Fawcett or any of the Charlie's Angels for me.
Ah, yes, the Davy Jones episode. Not quite as good as the "It's the new Jan Brady!" episode, but it's close.
I totally had a girl crush on Kristy McNichol.
My personal fav was the Marsha big swollen nose episode. Damn those randomly thrown footballs!
Yes, Valerie was hot but I hated the show she was on. You must be drooling at the Jenny Craig commercials she's on now!
My sister is going through a very similar ordeal with her step son. She raised him since before he was one because they found out (via a cigarrette burn) that the boy was being abused by the mom's boyfriend.
He is now almost 10 and in the past year my sister and husband have paid $11,000 in attorney's fees to try and keep him.
It breaks my heart how unfair the court system is to dads. Even if the mom is homeless, been in lots of trouble with the law and is a known drug user, the dad still has to continue to spend every last penny he has on a lawyer to keep the child he has taken care since practically birth.
Okay ... I am backing away from the soapbox now ... but I hear you sister
It's nice to know I'm not alone in the choir!
And, just for the record, you can borrow our soapbox anytime.
Amen!
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